An anatomy lesson

So, yeah, Armani revealed the new underpants advert featuring footballer David Beckham:

I drooled over it as did all the women and gay blokes that I know. It's a cool advert.

It's David Beckham in his underpants.

Aye, but here's the thing. I happened to glance at the comments left here and was amused at the people who suggested that he'd been Photoshopped.

Hmmm.

See, I'm a wee bit of a penis aficionado (as well you know) and I'm confoozled.

While I'm sure the pic has been 'shopped to correct shading and blemishes and such, I see nothing to suggest that David's naughty bits, his meat and two veg, Vicki's giggle stick and the twins, has been altered.

Looks like a lovely example of standard issue equipment there. I mean, what are these folks looking at? Are they aware of what a man's equipment really looks like? Have they ever actually seen male genitalia from this angle - live and in person - as in this modest version below?

Or have all the examples they've seen been so depressingly small that Mr Beckham looks egregiously large?

(Not that, let me hasten to say, he looks undersized. I'm eyeballing a nice banger there - pun intended - but nothing freakish.)

I think that the doubters of the photo fall into two categories: 1) jealous men, and 2) that most bizarre of females who honestly has no idea what she's looking at here. She's the woman on my baby boards who (alarmingly) is pregnant, will be raising a child here soon, and seriously has no idea of the actual mechanics of conception, pregnancy, and birth. She had no clue as to what a cervix is or that she ovulated at some midpoint between periods. She sincerely believes that pissing into drain opening chemicals will accurately predict the sex of her child and she refers to her genitalia as "down there" and her husband's penis as his "thing".

People, that lovely, large, firm bulge facing the camera is a scrotum (enhanced and supported by Mr Armani's undoubtedly expensive drawers). Mr Beckham's johnson is laid neatly to his right hand side pointing away from the camera.

Bats come with balls. This accounts for most of the mass in most men's shorts. Something along the lines of this:

A purty scrotum is a wonderful thing. Awwwww ... doesn't it make ya just want to pet it?

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PS: have ya ever been surfing pictures of penises on the 'nets and come across one and think: "Say ... that looks just like so-and-so's ..."?

OK, it's just me I guess.