In amongst ye!
"Oi, ensign, g'e us warp factor ten, we'll open this big bastard up ..."
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Today's What The Blue Fuck falls into the Stupid Ebayers category.
This needs to have a place of honour forever in The (Sic) File. Check it:
"2 ounce Mortise and pedestal glass"?!
Do you mean MORTAR and PESTLE you fucking dolt? Do they not teach English in Utah? Do you not own a dictionary? Fuck!
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Since we're ebaying here's a weird one ... Darth Penis.
As a Star Wars Geek to the 10th power, I gotta say, dude, anyone stupid enough to colour his penis black with a permanent marker (which contain alcohols, ouch! ouch! ouch!) steps over the boundary of Rabid Starwars Fan to Fucking Psycho Idiot. Sorry mate.
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And speaking of dressing up your chick sticker, howzabout this?
Kokigami the Japanese (of course) art of gift-wrapping your rod and presenting it to your lover. COOL, huh? There's even a handy book
There's a variation called tsutsumi which is more the wrapping of the penis in ribbon or lace in an intricate pattern. The 'recipient' then undoes the elabourate binding to find his or her man's best leg of three.
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And speaking of bound penises, I was relieved to find out that Tutankhamen penis has been located. Yeah, they feared it had been stolen or misplaced ("Jezus, what's this in my coat pocket, here? Looks like a moldy cigar ... FUCK me! It's Tut's dick! I wondered where that'd got to!")
The royal willy was in place when Tut was photographed immediately after being found (left. You don't even have to squint) but then vanished during restoration I believe.
*whew* Gotta watch those penii, they're apt to wander!
posted by MrsEvilGenius at 8:15 AM
2 Comments:
Oh, GOD! SO funny.
I come from a long line of Scots - it's inescapable: I've got MacLeod on one side and MacPherson and Fraser on the other. Seriously. I'm pretty sure I'm only a third generation American on my maternal side - her grandparents came off the boat from somewhere in the Midlands.
What's wrong with a mortis and pedestal, exactly? Isn't it possible that it's for someone who really, really reveres their homemade guacamole?
This is just so funny. Thanks for the comment over at my place today--always glad to find another RHPC fan in the universe.
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