Hey! I'm drivin' here! I'm drivin' here!
Yes, yes, yes ... I know I've blogged about this sixteen times before, but humour me, dammnit!
Please explain to me the concept of a person who is a totally fucking inconsiderate driver, but then gets fucked-off to the wide when shit doesn't go his way on the road. Do these cumwads not realize that they are shooting (heh, get it? Cum ... shooting? OK, nevermind) themselves in the foot by being such assholes?
Let's take driving in the left hand lane. Tell me the rules. Go on ... tell me.
There's really only one, isn't there?
If there are two or more lanes going in your direction, then slower drivers should stay in the right hand lane except to pass. How difficult is this to fathom? Get the fuck over. If you don't then the rest of us are forced to pass on the right which is dangerous (and illegal in some cases).
Oh and just because you're primly driving exactly the posted speed limit doesn't make your vagina shinier than mine and give you the inalienable right to hog the fast lane. The sign doesn't say "slower than the speed limit traffic keep right" after all. This is a no-brainer, people! I don't care if you're going ninety-five-fucking-miles-and-hour in the left lane, if someone comes up behind you going 96, then shove over!
Fucking, duh.
And while I'm bitching about it, is North Carolina the driving-slow-in-the-fast-lane capital of the world or is it just me? I used to think it was Georgia because I spent so much time trundling along behind various Crackers creeping down I-20 toward Augusta. I always chalked it up to A) there being mostly single-lane roads in Jawja, it just didn't occur to them that they could use all that other space, or B) all their roads are dirt and they are stunned to stupidity by all that South Carolina asphalt.
Driving to Winston-Salem every other day has adjusted my definition of rude drivers, lemme tell ya.
This chick for example: I was on 77 south, there between Charlotte and Rock Hill where it's four lanes wide in both directions. Counting left to right I was in the 3rd lane over (second from the right). There were a few slow cars ahead of me in the right-most lane, one directly ahead of me in my lane, and a couple farther back behind me in the left-most lane.
Since I was coming up on the car ahead of me I needed to get over so I did what I always do: Look over my left shoulder to see if there's a Toyota sized hole available (lane was empty), put on my turn signal, glance left again (just being paranoid), and come on over.
What I didn't know, during all of this, was that some twinkie in a white SUV had come barreling up the fast lane, decided she wanted to get into the very same lane as me, in the very same Toyota-sized spot as me, and sailed over withought a thought in her badly bleached head ... or benefit of turn signals.
How do I know for sure that she didn't have her blinkers on? Because her front grille appeared in my side fucking view mirror ("objects are closer than they appear") right as she laid on the horn, startling the snot out of me.
She came hauling arse around me - on the right - mouthing all sorts of clever epithets before running up behind the unfortunate soul whom I had just gone around. She seriously almost ran him over as well.
I also think she may have been psychic 'cause I'm pretty sure I lip-read 'bitch' in there somewhere and I mean, really! How did she ascertain that so accurately from way over there? Amazing!
So, what was this chickie? Legally blind? She was behind me and I had my blinkers on. They're not Christmas lights, people, they're indicators. Pay attention. Some hitherto unknown missing genetic link? A bitch who can use her horn but who's too fucking stupid to figure out her turn signals? What?
You are not in the groove, folks. This is the motorway not the speedway and you'd best be careful who you bully around out there. There's a few of us considerate drivers who might not be averse to trading some paint if you push us hard enough.
And my cars are all paid for, baybee.
Please explain to me the concept of a person who is a totally fucking inconsiderate driver, but then gets fucked-off to the wide when shit doesn't go his way on the road. Do these cumwads not realize that they are shooting (heh, get it? Cum ... shooting? OK, nevermind) themselves in the foot by being such assholes?
Let's take driving in the left hand lane. Tell me the rules. Go on ... tell me.
There's really only one, isn't there?
If there are two or more lanes going in your direction, then slower drivers should stay in the right hand lane except to pass. How difficult is this to fathom? Get the fuck over. If you don't then the rest of us are forced to pass on the right which is dangerous (and illegal in some cases).
Oh and just because you're primly driving exactly the posted speed limit doesn't make your vagina shinier than mine and give you the inalienable right to hog the fast lane. The sign doesn't say "slower than the speed limit traffic keep right" after all. This is a no-brainer, people! I don't care if you're going ninety-five-fucking-miles-and-hour in the left lane, if someone comes up behind you going 96, then shove over!
Fucking, duh.
And while I'm bitching about it, is North Carolina the driving-slow-in-the-fast-lane capital of the world or is it just me? I used to think it was Georgia because I spent so much time trundling along behind various Crackers creeping down I-20 toward Augusta. I always chalked it up to A) there being mostly single-lane roads in Jawja, it just didn't occur to them that they could use all that other space, or B) all their roads are dirt and they are stunned to stupidity by all that South Carolina asphalt.
Driving to Winston-Salem every other day has adjusted my definition of rude drivers, lemme tell ya.
This chick for example: I was on 77 south, there between Charlotte and Rock Hill where it's four lanes wide in both directions. Counting left to right I was in the 3rd lane over (second from the right). There were a few slow cars ahead of me in the right-most lane, one directly ahead of me in my lane, and a couple farther back behind me in the left-most lane.
Since I was coming up on the car ahead of me I needed to get over so I did what I always do: Look over my left shoulder to see if there's a Toyota sized hole available (lane was empty), put on my turn signal, glance left again (just being paranoid), and come on over.
What I didn't know, during all of this, was that some twinkie in a white SUV had come barreling up the fast lane, decided she wanted to get into the very same lane as me, in the very same Toyota-sized spot as me, and sailed over withought a thought in her badly bleached head ... or benefit of turn signals.
How do I know for sure that she didn't have her blinkers on? Because her front grille appeared in my side fucking view mirror ("objects are closer than they appear") right as she laid on the horn, startling the snot out of me.
She came hauling arse around me - on the right - mouthing all sorts of clever epithets before running up behind the unfortunate soul whom I had just gone around. She seriously almost ran him over as well.
I also think she may have been psychic 'cause I'm pretty sure I lip-read 'bitch' in there somewhere and I mean, really! How did she ascertain that so accurately from way over there? Amazing!
So, what was this chickie? Legally blind? She was behind me and I had my blinkers on. They're not Christmas lights, people, they're indicators. Pay attention. Some hitherto unknown missing genetic link? A bitch who can use her horn but who's too fucking stupid to figure out her turn signals? What?
You are not in the groove, folks. This is the motorway not the speedway and you'd best be careful who you bully around out there. There's a few of us considerate drivers who might not be averse to trading some paint if you push us hard enough.
And my cars are all paid for, baybee.
posted by MrsEvilGenius at 6:47 AM
3 Comments:
Jesus How many Blogs can you freaking maintain. Who is Wendy Ann
Y'all all went to high school together. Remember high school? It was that big building in Irmo where you had to go every week-day. LOL!
And I don't think 3 blogs is too many ... I was toying with the idea of another one *snicker*
-Blue
so...
I live in Eastern Idaho... we have a highway between Rexburg (where I'm in college) and Idaho Falls (where my parents live)... this lovely split highway has exits on BOTH the left and right sides of the highway... not with ramps, just random exits... where farmers live... old ones... in big trucks... or (better yet) tractors... so they drive for about 10 or 15 minutes, going INCREDIBLY slow, in the passing lane... where it is illegal to drive... meanwhile all the well-meaning Christians that populate this area of the state go 3 or 4 miles UNDER the speed limit in the right lane... so there's no where to drive, you know, the speed limit... fucking oldman numbskulls... fucking Christan mommies in their vans... sigh
anyway... I feel your pain
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